Archive for December, 2008

Day by day

I’m taking things day by day at the moment. I’m making it my goal not to worry about my weight or what I eat but also to exercise as much as I can, to make good choices as much as I can, to listen to my body and to forgive myself if I screw up. No weigh-ins till some time in January and that’s just that.

Dunno how much I’ll be blogging between now and Christmas, lots to do like everyone else. So Happy Christmas one and all! Hope it’s a great one for everyone.

On that note and thinking of those who’s Christmas may be filled with worry and fear check out this post of Mizfits where every comment will lead to a donation to Mizfits local domestic violence shelter.

We should all remember to count our blessings and think about all the good things in our lives as unfortunately there is always someone out there who is really suffering.

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Lost in the madness

This will have to be quick. Life just seems to be crazy, crazy, crazy lately. A combination of the rapidly approaching Christmas festivities and just other life stuff thrown in the mix too.

I feel like I’m losing the plot. I’m ridiculously stressed and the dodgy eating choices I’ve been making aren’t helping me one little bit. On I struggle though because what else am I to do.
It’s not like I really have that much to do if I’m honest but it’s just finding the time to fit in what I do need to get done and the thoughts swirling in my head of “I need to do this, that and the other!”. (I must add a book on reducing stress to my Christmas wish list!)

Anyway the long and the short of it is I didn’t fit in my official weigh-in this week. Unofficially I reckon I’m up a pound or two. Hardly surprising at this time of year. My next official weigh-in falls on Christmas Day!! So as a present to myself I’m skipping that one. I’ll try not to go too crazy though and will make every effort to keep my exercise levels up and my bread levels down over the holidays. Now it’s back to the to-do list with me….

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Eating too fast…. habit or ?

A big problem of mine is that I eat much too quickly. The question suddenly entered my head last night (after I did it yet again) of whether it’s all down to habit or if in fact it’s a way to allow/enable myself to overeat and worry about it later. Funnily enough I generally take my time when the food I am eating is healthier.

Does that make any sense? What I’m feeling happens is that if I eat that plate of fries or that slice of cake really quickly I literally don’t have time to stop and ask myself “are you full now?”, “should you stop now?”, “do you really want that?”. Instead I wolf it down and when only I’m done do I ask those questions and of course berate myself for the answers !!

Yes part of it is habit but I’m really thinking now that some of it is me not wanting to acknowledge or listen to what my body & mind might just be telling me.

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I’m struggling today and I’m really not sure why. Some possibilities are that it’s Monday and I’m tired, PMT is also approaching so that could be a part of it too. It could be that today I am just feeling a bit sorry for myself (for no good reason) and have decided to “treat” myself with food. Except I just feel stuffed, bloated and fed-up now rather than treated!!

More worryingly I seem to have re-found biscuits! This is not a good thing. Because I cannot have 1 or 2 biscuits, I will more than likely eat the entire packet if the humour takes me and and if I’ve learned only one thing in my 30 years on this planet it’s that eating copious amounts of biscuits does not lead to weight loss!!!! SHOCK HORROR

So around 3pm I started my day over. I resolved to forget about what I ate earlier and focus on making good choices for the remainder of the day. I also resolved to really push myself at my weights class after work. Thankfully I stuck to those resolutions but it still scares me how easily the old habits and mentality can creep back in. What gives me hope is that these days I generally realise very quickly how bad my body feels when I over-eat rubbish.

Right now however I’m in a crappy, crappy mood. I long to use food to suffocate my feelings of grumpiness and crappiness but while I know for 5 mins it might succeed it won’t work in the long term. It will just make me feel even grumpier and crappier. So I’m off to bed where I can do no harm and hopefully I’ll wake up in a different(better!) mood tomorrow!!

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Weigh-in update

2 weeks and 1 day on. I am up 1 pound. This doesn’t seem too bad to me considering I was away for a few days of that and while I didn’t snack in between meals too much my eating certainly didn’t fall into the extra healthy category either!

I would have liked to have stayed the same though because I did a good bit of exercise between now and then. I’m happy over all however because a year ago I would have gone away, ate all round me, put on 4, 5, even 6 pounds, felt like crap and used it as an excuse to keep eating until Christmas! Not any more though and hopefully never again.

The Christmas season is indeed upon us however with our office Christmas party happening next week !!! Then there must be at least one if not two things on every week until Christmas that will involve food and alcohol. It will be very hard but if I keep up the exercise, try to keep away from bread and processed crap I should be able to hold my own. I just need to listen to my body and make conscious choices.

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I entered the Mary Lou's Weigh Platform Giveaway!

Check out Roni’s Weight Loss Blog for more information.

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Christmas, Christmas, Christmas!!! Why oh why does it all have to start so early?! Why are people so intent on rushing their lives away and why does it have to be so commercial?!

I’m not very religious, I’m not religious at all to be honest but I still think Christmas shouldn’t be just all about buying stuff!!! Of course it’s wonderful to give and receive but that sentiment seems more often than not to be lost these days. I find this time so stressful, trying to get organised and get everything bought. Sometimes I wish I could just bypass it all and skip ahead to January. It would certainly be better for my weighing scales too!!!

I know this is a miserable attitude to have but the older I get the more the good seems to have just been sucked out of Christmas.

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Crazy, crazy, crazy.

I haven’t ran away from blogland (not yet anyway). I was away for a few days last week and things have just been crazy busy since. With Christmas fast approaching and a number of big projects on my to do list as well as the everyday house and work stuff I just can’t seem to get control or even my breath at times!

Forgetting about that for a second my little break last week with my hubby was just lovely. I could really relax and not worry about what needed to be done because I wasn’t in a position to be able to do anything about it! If I could just find that inner calm at home it would be great! I ate lots of wonderful (high calorie!) food while away but hey that’s ok. We didn’t go crazy snacking and generally stuck to 3 meals a day and I’m impressed with myself about that. I am starting this week however with the aim of being as bread (and other carb) free as possible to just get rid of the bloating if nothing else. No weigh-in last week over being away so I’ll see this week how I’ve really done.

I’ve been doing really well with the exercise and it’s probably what is allowing me to maintain some sense of stress control but then of course it takes away time that I need to do other stuff so maybe it adds to the stress a bit too! I know I need it though and the rest can and will wait.

So that’s it for now. I hope those of you that celebrate Thanksgiving had a lovely time!! Maybe we can all de-carb together and clear our heads a bit before the Christmas madness descends fully !? 🙂

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