Why do we find it so hard to like ourselves? I have a tendency to be paranoid and fear (sometimes even assume!) that anything I find critical in others might also apply to myself. I’m much too introspective and think WAY too much. I constantly wonder do people really like me. Am I being criticized or laughed at behind my back?. I know liking and loving myself is more important but it’s also so much easier said than done. There’s no step by step instructions on how to learn to love yourself.
Then go add god damn photos to the mess! I just saw some from a few weekends ago and holy crap I hardly recognise myself. Why do I see something totally different in the mirror and in my mind? I look huge in those photos. I look like I’ve made no progress, that I’ve just been deluding myself. I know photos tend not to have the nicest effects on us and the camera adds lbs and all that but still I just look like an entirely different person than the one in my mind. The big question is which view is right? Am I kidding myself about how well I’m looking these days? Is the cold light of the camera just highlighting all the work left to do? I’m so fed up and disillusioned right now and I shouldn’t be as I had a weigh in with my trainer this week and I’ve definitely lost some weight though I have no clue how much as I’m still not looking at the scales. That’s about 6 weeks of scale “blindness” now and I’ve lost some weight which means I’m doing something right. Now if I could just fix this brain of mine all would be right with the world.
“Just because you’re paranoid, don’t mean they’re not after you.”
I don’t know what to say as I’m in a funk right now and feel exactly the same way (only without the progress as of yet). Don’t have any answers. I hope you feel better.
If you find out why we do those things, please let me know 🙂