Archive for the ‘low self esteem’ Category

Battle implies some resistance on my part however, of which there was none. Major, major lesson learned this week (not one that really needed to be learned of course as I know it too bloody well). If it’s in the house I will eat it, ergo do not have it in the house. It meaning any item of food that I cannot resist or that is overly tempting in any way!!!

Aaaaaaagggggggggggggggggggggh. I’m mad at myself for eating them. I also ate stupid G&B Orange dark choc too at work but that’s finished now and will not be bought again unless it’s for a really special occasion or something equally deserving.

I did have a very good food day otherwise and got in some walking/jogging as well.

I’m thinking that I may need to investigate how many calories I should be eating every day to lose weight and sustain exercise. Perhaps foolishly, my current plan is to eat as healthy and naturally as possible but not to count points or calories. With some decent exercise at least 4 to 5 times a week I think this plan can work. Well I know it did last week!

I’m increasingly aware of the need to eat enough though, especially when exercising (the right stuff of course). I’m scared to count points or calories because as I’ve mentioned before I feel it makes me overly focus on food and the more I end up thinking about food the more I end up eating. Maybe a rough idea of calories would be good enough ?! I dunno. Maybe I should just try to stick to my current plan and not worry about it.

Another positive step I feel I made was to get a book on Self-Esteem which was mentioned on Hilary’s blog. I have only read a few pages and I’m already identifying with the low self-esteem issues mentioned so hopefully this book will help me too.


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What to write.

My last post was too short. I find it hard to know what to write sometimes. I suppose I don’t think I have anything very interesting to say especially when I read all the other great stuff that’s out there. I know thinking that way shows a lack of self-confidence and self-esteem which most definitely is an issue for me.

I possibly find it hard to write enough because I want to keep this blog as anonymous as possible. I guess I just wouldn’t feel comfortable talking to my work-mates, family and friends in this way and about this subject. I think the main point is that this whole thing/adventure/experiment is for me. It’s something I’m doing for myself to help myself. In this area I come first. I don’t want people that know me, that have a certain view point on the person they see me as, being involved or aware of this. As a result I’m wary of going into too much detail about me or my life in case it identifies me. It’s something I’m going to have to work on. I’m sure it’s highly unlikely that any of them would find this blog but I still don’t want to take any chances.

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